Blog Post from August 2017
One month ago, I posted my first blog post. 10 ways to start loving yourself the way you deserve to be loved. I called it Part 1 because so much comes to my mind of the things that have set me on my journey to self love and of the millions of perspectives one might be able to talk about them.
After recently losing a dearly loved close family member, I want to dedicate the blog posts to all the beautiful souls on this planet, struggling at the moment in time. The energy that we are experiencing is pretty strong. There is a movement happening, the universe is urging us to become our true selves, to let go of the patterns that don't truly serve us and our well being. To let go of attachment to the things that are unhealthy, be it unconscious or conscious habits. Habits can be as subtle as thinking patterns that rule our emotions and therefore our behaviors. The way we react to things is what matters, as life will always throw things our way. We may not forget that the more we respond to what life throws us with consciousness of our soul, in calmness and stillness, not reacting to things automatically on autopilot, the more we strengthen our relationship to the light, the life energy.
Every time we 'react' to things, when we let our ego respond, instead of our soul, our thoughts will go haywire and lead us to respond 'defensively' or in ways that we might regret after. Also, the more negativity we acquire and carry around us through short circuit fulfillment behaviors such as 'reacting', the more of the same things we 'don't want' will we attract.
Problem is that this negativity can pull quite strongly. Thought patterns that don't serve you, lead to behaviors that don't serve you and easily become addictions (without even noticing - its that clever). Addictions don't have to be around drugs, alcohol or food only, they are everything we do and cannot easily stop doing.
This is why we tend to do things we don't actually 'agree' with but still do it. This is why we always promise ourselves we will do this and that, but never do. Something is keeping us right there.
The relationship that the body has created to this habit is so strong that it becomes your 'comfort zone'. This comfort zone has no cycle of energy, it only goes one direction. Its stagnant and its only - attracting more negative energy (energy that weighs you down).
The great things is, we can change that. Any moment! We need to know that we are the ones 'choosing' to stay in an addiction. For example, a good indicator of knowing if there has been an addiction formed within you in any area is; 'if we feel 'defensive' when we hear or read this for instance', because it is one. Otherwise your ego wouldn't respond to it and just not care. If our ego responds, is because it has a too tight relationship to whatever it is that is being talked about, identifying too much with it or even feeling too much of a need to 'have' this or that.
What we want is to purify our energy. Creating flow, will cleanse the stagnant, negative energy around us just like a river is usually clean water, while a pond is usually dirtier. Its because of constant movement. Washing out the old bringing in the new! This is made by breaking through stuck cycles.
Doing things differently!
To do this we have to act proactively to things, restrict on 'reacting' while its happening, so we can build the muscle and strengthen the relationship with the habits we want to create! The more often we do that the easier it becomes and this is the way out of habits that don't serve us.
Ultimately this is what loving yourself truly means.
What is your area that you feel difficulty in stopping or changing? What thoughts/behaviors can you not let go of? Might they stand in your way of having or being who you want to be?
What are your recurring patterns? What might they give you?
I am aware we all have things to work on, we all have addictions and we all struggle to work on certain things. They vary from person to person, so no judgement whatsoever. My shit is not better than your shit!
But nevertheless admitting to ourselves that work needs to be done is the key to pure freedom. You are your treasure!!
So here follow the other 5 things to help you to truly love yourself:
6. See the lesson in everything and practice letting go - Whatever the situation, there is a truly powerful and loving message being delivered to you. It might seem that the package looks quite harsh, but if we look between the lines, we had something to learn and without this happening we probably wouldn't have seen it. Life will always enrich us with lessons that we can take from 'challenges'. If it is a loss of something or someone or a big unexpected change that really makes you tremble, you can chose to see the good in it. Everything in life comes to us for a purpose. So what could it be that you might have had to learn? One can only get to this by being truly and honestly open to oneself. Admitting to oneself that one has things to learn will open up the ability to see what the message is. This is important to move on from this kind of challenge for it not to become recurring and also for us to grow and not feel affected as much as we once used to when faced with something similar again. By seeing, we will only become stronger. Deflecting, will make us weaker.
7. Tune into your body - What is your body communicating with you? Each and every single moment our body communicates with us. With itself (as it is like, the most intelligent and freakily amazing self-functioning miracle machine ever) and with 'us', our conscious selves.
Also important to mention that our soul and our body are perfectly entwined with each other. One doesn't go without the other. Have you got a cold, maybe your body is telling you to slow down, do you feel tired all the time, is your heart racing incertain moments? Observe yourself and listen. What can you feel? And when? We can learn so much simply by observing. One of my favourite books is 'Your body is telling you: Love Yourself' by Lise Bourbeau http://lisebourbeau.com/en/books/. It is not a coincidence that one might tend to have throat aches more than others or even that a certain illness appears in your life. Some people have to adapt stronger habits than others to go against what 'runs in the family' but its the soul telling us through our body that we need to change our habits. Illness is not a punishment it is our body communicating with us to adapt to what our soul truly needs. (I'm not a doctor and I don't tell you what you might or might not suffer from, but its worth having a look at this, at reading your souls language through your own body). We can always improve on things, we can always make changes. We are no victims. We are our own master! Whatever we feed it, food to drinks to medication, to cigarettes, to whatever has an effect on our body, physically and spiritually - It can damage or it can heal! We will know for ourselves what truly is the right thing for us if we just tune in and listen to ourselves and watch our body communicating to us, from us.
8. Do more things that truly excite you - Since the feeling of excitement makes us happy, sends of endorphins through our body and creates a healthy bit of positive energy flowing through us, it is actually a no-brainer to do more things that excite us! We want to attract more positive things, we need to do more positive things. What excites you is unique to you and no one can tell you what this is! Embrace it and have fun! It will spark creative energy that will get the inspirations flowing. This space is where ideas can come flushing in and everything seems possible! Its about priorities. Once you understand that doing things you truly love and make your heart shine bright will give you more quality at your life, be it at work, in your business and with your relationships, you will prioritize them more :) Try it out and see for yourself! What have you not done in a long while but that was really fun? What is a hobby you have stopped doing or what can add more sparkle into your week?
9. Share your time with people around you - Its easy to get caught up in our own stuff and have our head hanging down in our phones or in our computers, not really seeing whats around us or who is around us when walking on the street. Life can get so busy sometimes and so fast too, but we forget (not intentionally) to snap out of it and actually open our eyes and be present for people around us. Even calling a friend out of the blue, even if you don't feel like it right now, lending a helping hand to people you don't know out on the street, or even just throwing a smile at someone. It can make a true difference! When we do things that go out of our way and truly embrace those moments, with the energy 'because we want to' , not because we have to, we can transform a situation that might at first have been something we didn't feel like doing, into something that generates energy for ourselves and for the world.
10. Communicate fearlessly and kindly - Be assertive - Communication is probably the most important quality ever. For the relationship we have to ourselves and the relationships we have with others. First we communicate to ourselves, we can tell ourselves lies because it makes us 'feel' better, but in the long run it damages us. If we communicate to ourselves truthfully, even if it is difficult, we can also let it go easier. Then, when we communicate it out into the world, the universe receives that authenticity, and reflects it back to us. The energy will be purified for us and the topic dealt with.
If we suppress whatever is on our mind and our hearts, it will only grow into something bigger inside. It might come out reactively in smaller situations, in ways that we could otherwise avoid, simply by speaking about it to the person there and then. There and then, in the sense of, when you know the time is right, when it comes from a loving place and not from the place of the ego-self.
True communication is communicating what you 'truly' feel, there is no need to be scared to communicate your truth. No fear is to be had of the reactions of the other person. It is ok to be confident with your truth! The universe responds well with every truth you speak. Its authentic! So no fear, even if it might be an uncomfortable situation at the time, it will pass and reap the rewards of the seeds you planted afterwards.
Lastly, communication is also not just about letting out and venting to someone without being open to hear the others point of view. Hearing out the other person will make you be heard more too. Listening openly can heal many 'problems' one might have, this includes admitting one might even be in the 'wrong' sometimes, and letting go on the attachment of that, which is healing.
It cleanses your energy, It enables you to live fearlessly your true self, It attracts people you resonate with and It makes you be lovingly assertive, living the life YOU want to live, affecting people positively in return because you owe it to yourself!