COMMUNICATION - A key Basic Human Need
The world is full of impressions. Every corner you look there are impressions, from adverts around the city to social media, peoples behaviors and reactions, peoples lifestyles, cultures, landscapes, skylines and all of it leaves an impression inside of you.
Your upbringing leaves impressions that form your world views, assumptions, beliefs and forms your experiences depending on the lenses you wear. Impression is an image, image linked to a feeling, a sense, a smell… Impressions shape our inner and outer world. So what is truly for you?
We are basically a live version of a camera filming our lives. Our subconscious takes up 4billion bits per second of information, the amount of impressions we absorb a day is extensive. What we filter through and make ours depends on where our focus lies, so again what we have taken up as important, however we still absorb way more than we are aware of. We filter about 2k bits per second, so that is quite a big difference.
There seems to be an imbalance in expression and impression.
We are all creative beings and communication is one of the most important elements of our existence as a form of expression. This can be verbally but most of it happens non-verbally. Either it’s the sense you get from a person when they walk into a room or what you read from a person even when they don’t talk. Our intuition is sending us wise information we receive beyond the physical, in our dreams or in our body through sense or imagery all of the time. So to have a filtering system I s quite a good thing. Otherwise we wouldn’t be able to handle it.
When it comes down to the problems we face in our lives, the greatest block always comes down to a lack of effective and honest communication. But how to communicate effectively if we have learnt that what we think and feel isn’t valid. People are scared to own their truth, to speak their minds and to be different to other peoples ideals or expectations, basically to just be themselves. Why is that? Parents feel the responsibility for their children and take on the role of guiding them into the ‘right’ direction. What this does is that the parents expectations, ideas and fears are put upon the child. Their own intuitive quality is ignored. So how can one truly build a good relationship with themselves if the parent doesn’t trust the child's inner guidance?
What happens is that then they will not listen to their own inner guidance and listen to the parents in order to receive praise and ultimately love. Later either this sends the young adult into rebellion against the parents or into becoming like them. But ultimately either direction, it wont make them happy as neither of them is their true selves.
So they bend their truth in order to protect their feelings or don’t express their truth in the first place. This creates a reality in their lives they choose that is based around other things than the ones they would enjoy because what it all comes down to is the need and desire to be loved.
It creates a people pleasing behaviour ( I have been suffering from that and all the following symptoms) such as anxiety, depression, addiction, burnout.
If we are not allowed to express our truth, in other words communicate our truth and our thoughts where we know they are not ridiculed, rejected or dismissed, we form behaviours around pleasing others in order to create harmony in our lives. At least this is what we learn as children and this sets the foundations for our choices in our later lives.
So one, we don’t express our truth be it through our creative natural expression or our words, second we are impressed with information of what we should do and nowadays of a vast amount of possibilities out there that cause symptoms such as overwhelm, anxiety, confusion, seeking instant gratification fulfilment with people that never learnt how to choose what is truly theirs.
Some ways of how LOM and PM Art Therapy works to regain and stabilise that inner balance and gain inner strength, creating fulfilment from inside is by working closely with memories appearing as inner images, which affect our inner world, which can then be corrected, changed and create a new imprint in the mind that is empowering instead of causing continuous suffering.
The body doesn’t know when a traumatic event is over, that’s why this form of work is great as its where words solely can’t get to. Trauma will act as if it was still active in order to alarm us in case something similar happens again. Most of the time what it does is hinder us from living fully.
In that process of expression of the feelings connected to the memory, communication opens up and ones truth is set free and transformed. This creates healing and the unbroken self can become visible.
If we get to a stage where we can express our feelings, thoughts and ideas courageously, we become happier in turn.
Being mindful of what we listen to and watch and read is also a way of taking responsibility over our lives as with the understanding of the silent impact imagery and all the impressions of the world have on us, we can make better choices for our wellbeing.
It takes communication to gain a deeper understanding of oneself, be it through talking or creative expression. Communicating with someone openly, when knowing one won’t be interrupted or judged is true bliss, so it takes a safe space to make the most of it.
If you are having difficulties communicating your truth to your partner or family or bringing your ideas out into the world, starting with talking about it in a safe space will help to feel ready to take it confidently out into the open. Most of the times it’s the idea in the head, in other words the fear when imagining what might happen when being open, vulnerable and honest that’s the most scary part of all. What happens when you communicate your truth more confidently, relationships will get easier and you will feel lighter and unburdened inside which I personally find is one of the most freeing sensations.